Coaches must be sure the culture of their program is grounded on the mentorship of student-athletes to be not only great competitors, but people of high character and integrity. Coaches are mentors when they are master teachers and are role models in everything they say and do. They have had a “successful” season when they have built the self-esteem and self-confidence of their players so that individually and as a team they have achieved things they did not think were possible.
When their players not only know how to do these things, but can also teach others how to do them, coaches achieve the ultimate goal of Coaching Champions for Life.
Coaches of Champions for Life must find practical ways to develop players not just as competitors, but to use the sport proactively to teach them life lessons. I call this the process of holistic coaching.
Specifically, coaches must teach players that the value of a person’s life is the impact he or she has had on other people. The purpose of life is to be successful and significant. To be “successful” means to: (a) determine the gifts God gave you; (b) which of them you are so passionate about you want to spend 8 – 10 hours a day doing; and (c) developing them to be better than anyone else you know into marketable skills, not just a hobby.
To be “significant” means we use our gifts to help and serve others particularly the less fortunate and to make the world a better place. The goal is not to be just a person of success, but rather to be a person of value, i.e., significant.
A team has two goals every day: (1) could we have defeated out toughest competition today? And (2) did our conduct inspire those who observed us to be better in their lives?
The first step in the process is a critical one – the coaches and the program must strictly adhere to the philosophy that, “We coach people, not sports; it is the quality of the person, not the player that is the most significant outcome.”
The reason this is mandatory is coaches must learn to change how they see the members of their team (and frankly, the way they see their coaches too). Most coaches look at the members of their team and see players, i.e., members of a team that, if developed properly, can help them win games and championships. What they fail to realize is that to develop the player to be the best they can be, they must first develop the athlete. And before they can develop the athlete to be the best they can be, they must relate to, connect with and validate the person.
Sometimes this paradigm shift in thinking is a tough sell when coaches are being evaluated by an Athletic Director and/or by parents solely on wins and losses. As any experienced CCFL Coach will attest, communications from past players thanking them for being their coach universally have one thing in common; they almost never discuss wins and losses; they only describe the impact the coach has had on the player’s life.
As a practical matter then, the first step is to begin all preparations, for the season, for the week and for each practice session, by planning how coaches are going to teach life lessons to their players. This planning is done well in advance of the season and then continues each week and each practice session once the season begins. Specifically, within the strict confines of time, regulations and resources of their program, how will they teach them to be better sons, daughters, siblings, students, business and community leaders while simultaneously developing them as athletes, players and teammates to win games?
When goal-setting for the season, a coach should use the same process-oriented methodology to teach life lessons as the coach would use to teach the mechanics of their sport. For example, if the ultimate goal is to mentor the person to be a better son or daughter, a coach should not just tell the person they should be respectful and appreciative of their parents.
At the youth level, the coach should actually require such things as having the player go immediately after practice to their parents and thank them for bringing them to practice and for supporting them in their sport. The coach could require the player to volunteer to do at least one thing to help the parent prepare dinner for the family each night. The player could also be required to do such things as read with or help a sibling do homework for ½ hour each night. The coach should notify the parents that these are requirements imposed by the coach and the coach should follow up on whether the player actually is doing them. The list is endless, but you get the idea.
In my experience, words are very powerful. I have always discussed inspirational quotes as a designed part of each practice or training session with my athletes. I even wrote a book for use by coaches for this purpose – Takeaway Quotes for Coaching Champions for Life.
At the start of and during each practice or training session, I use quotes relating to the sport that we discuss as a team to raise the Sport IQ of the players. I also assign homework to assist in this process. For example, I assign each player to research a current All-Star or a Hall of Fame player that played their position and ask them to learn what made that player a great player and a great person (or not).
At the end of a training session, I discuss a quote that is a life lesson to mentor the player(s) how to be a better person of high moral character and integrity. However, some of these life lessons need to be role played during practice occasionally, e.g., weekly, so the players learn how to handle these issues in a real-world way.
Yes, it takes time, so you need to prepare these role paying scenarios prior to the season and to delegate some of them to your assistant coaches too. And believe it or not, it is becoming very common for coaches in many sports to start their practices in the classroom where these role playing activities are easy to do. Although some of them might have more effect on the field.
Having guest speakers come to practice to talk about how playing the sport prepared them to be a better person later in life is also very powerful.
During practice, the commitment to teach life lessons must be at the tip of a coach’s mind constantly. Every coach in the program must be constantly looking for opportunities to relate what is happening in the sport to something in the players’ lives - how can I relate what we are learning about our sport to the players so they will be better people, siblings, sons, daughters, spouses, students, employees, and community leaders? Remember, always see the players first as people with lives you are preparing to be successful beyond your program and next as athletes, i.e., student-athletes, and the teaching life lessons mindset will become second nature over time.
The sport and life lessons that can be taught and role played are not a mystery – they have been the same from the beginning of time. They include:
1. Sport – injuries, bad weather, poor playing conditions, bad calls by officials, disputes about playing time, ineligibility of players by grades or conduct, bad language, bad attitudes, “helicopter” or unruly parents, disrespect from other teams, etc.
2. Self – attitude, work ethic, leadership, adversity, self-confidence, self-pity, self-esteem, self-advocacy, self-awareness, self-image, self-control, character, integrity, spirituality, prayer, academics and careers;
3. Relationships – peer pressure, bullying, envy, the media, positive affirmations to teammates;
4. Temptations – smoking, drugs, alcohol and sex.
At the start of your season, a coach should anonymously survey the team, coaches and players, to learn what they think are the positives, negatives, securities and insecurities in their lives. (“Never assume mental or emotional stability from athletic ability!” Many self-inflicted tragedies occur from this erroneous assumption!) These responses will be a guide as to what are the timeliest issues to be discussed.
One more tip regarding teaching life lessons; use team-building activities to illustrate them! My favorite ones to teach life lessons are those that involve service to others with no expectation of monetary return such as:
Miracle League – youth with disabilities
Children’s Hospitals
Community Work Projects
Gather Used BB Gear for Disadvantaged Youth – ABCA “Turn Two for
Youth”
Volunteer at Elementary Schools
Host a “Parents Night Out” with players as babysitters
Canned Food Drives
Raise Awareness Campaigns
Clean up a city park or a local youth league’s baseball field
Help to promote and work at a school event
Read/discuss as a team “Chop Wood, Carry Water” by Joshua Medcalf
Also, if you want cheerleaders, band and drill team members to attend and support your games like they do other sporting events at your school, try attending their competitions as a sign of school spirit and reciprocity. You will find they will appreciate it very much!
When we do these things we coach champions, Champions for Life.
When their players not only know how to do these things, but can also teach others how to do them, coaches achieve the ultimate goal of Coaching Champions for Life.
Coaches of Champions for Life must find practical ways to develop players not just as competitors, but to use the sport proactively to teach them life lessons. I call this the process of holistic coaching.
Specifically, coaches must teach players that the value of a person’s life is the impact he or she has had on other people. The purpose of life is to be successful and significant. To be “successful” means to: (a) determine the gifts God gave you; (b) which of them you are so passionate about you want to spend 8 – 10 hours a day doing; and (c) developing them to be better than anyone else you know into marketable skills, not just a hobby.
To be “significant” means we use our gifts to help and serve others particularly the less fortunate and to make the world a better place. The goal is not to be just a person of success, but rather to be a person of value, i.e., significant.
A team has two goals every day: (1) could we have defeated out toughest competition today? And (2) did our conduct inspire those who observed us to be better in their lives?
The first step in the process is a critical one – the coaches and the program must strictly adhere to the philosophy that, “We coach people, not sports; it is the quality of the person, not the player that is the most significant outcome.”
The reason this is mandatory is coaches must learn to change how they see the members of their team (and frankly, the way they see their coaches too). Most coaches look at the members of their team and see players, i.e., members of a team that, if developed properly, can help them win games and championships. What they fail to realize is that to develop the player to be the best they can be, they must first develop the athlete. And before they can develop the athlete to be the best they can be, they must relate to, connect with and validate the person.
Sometimes this paradigm shift in thinking is a tough sell when coaches are being evaluated by an Athletic Director and/or by parents solely on wins and losses. As any experienced CCFL Coach will attest, communications from past players thanking them for being their coach universally have one thing in common; they almost never discuss wins and losses; they only describe the impact the coach has had on the player’s life.
As a practical matter then, the first step is to begin all preparations, for the season, for the week and for each practice session, by planning how coaches are going to teach life lessons to their players. This planning is done well in advance of the season and then continues each week and each practice session once the season begins. Specifically, within the strict confines of time, regulations and resources of their program, how will they teach them to be better sons, daughters, siblings, students, business and community leaders while simultaneously developing them as athletes, players and teammates to win games?
When goal-setting for the season, a coach should use the same process-oriented methodology to teach life lessons as the coach would use to teach the mechanics of their sport. For example, if the ultimate goal is to mentor the person to be a better son or daughter, a coach should not just tell the person they should be respectful and appreciative of their parents.
At the youth level, the coach should actually require such things as having the player go immediately after practice to their parents and thank them for bringing them to practice and for supporting them in their sport. The coach could require the player to volunteer to do at least one thing to help the parent prepare dinner for the family each night. The player could also be required to do such things as read with or help a sibling do homework for ½ hour each night. The coach should notify the parents that these are requirements imposed by the coach and the coach should follow up on whether the player actually is doing them. The list is endless, but you get the idea.
In my experience, words are very powerful. I have always discussed inspirational quotes as a designed part of each practice or training session with my athletes. I even wrote a book for use by coaches for this purpose – Takeaway Quotes for Coaching Champions for Life.
At the start of and during each practice or training session, I use quotes relating to the sport that we discuss as a team to raise the Sport IQ of the players. I also assign homework to assist in this process. For example, I assign each player to research a current All-Star or a Hall of Fame player that played their position and ask them to learn what made that player a great player and a great person (or not).
At the end of a training session, I discuss a quote that is a life lesson to mentor the player(s) how to be a better person of high moral character and integrity. However, some of these life lessons need to be role played during practice occasionally, e.g., weekly, so the players learn how to handle these issues in a real-world way.
Yes, it takes time, so you need to prepare these role paying scenarios prior to the season and to delegate some of them to your assistant coaches too. And believe it or not, it is becoming very common for coaches in many sports to start their practices in the classroom where these role playing activities are easy to do. Although some of them might have more effect on the field.
Having guest speakers come to practice to talk about how playing the sport prepared them to be a better person later in life is also very powerful.
During practice, the commitment to teach life lessons must be at the tip of a coach’s mind constantly. Every coach in the program must be constantly looking for opportunities to relate what is happening in the sport to something in the players’ lives - how can I relate what we are learning about our sport to the players so they will be better people, siblings, sons, daughters, spouses, students, employees, and community leaders? Remember, always see the players first as people with lives you are preparing to be successful beyond your program and next as athletes, i.e., student-athletes, and the teaching life lessons mindset will become second nature over time.
The sport and life lessons that can be taught and role played are not a mystery – they have been the same from the beginning of time. They include:
1. Sport – injuries, bad weather, poor playing conditions, bad calls by officials, disputes about playing time, ineligibility of players by grades or conduct, bad language, bad attitudes, “helicopter” or unruly parents, disrespect from other teams, etc.
2. Self – attitude, work ethic, leadership, adversity, self-confidence, self-pity, self-esteem, self-advocacy, self-awareness, self-image, self-control, character, integrity, spirituality, prayer, academics and careers;
3. Relationships – peer pressure, bullying, envy, the media, positive affirmations to teammates;
4. Temptations – smoking, drugs, alcohol and sex.
At the start of your season, a coach should anonymously survey the team, coaches and players, to learn what they think are the positives, negatives, securities and insecurities in their lives. (“Never assume mental or emotional stability from athletic ability!” Many self-inflicted tragedies occur from this erroneous assumption!) These responses will be a guide as to what are the timeliest issues to be discussed.
One more tip regarding teaching life lessons; use team-building activities to illustrate them! My favorite ones to teach life lessons are those that involve service to others with no expectation of monetary return such as:
Miracle League – youth with disabilities
Children’s Hospitals
Community Work Projects
Gather Used BB Gear for Disadvantaged Youth – ABCA “Turn Two for
Youth”
Volunteer at Elementary Schools
Host a “Parents Night Out” with players as babysitters
Canned Food Drives
Raise Awareness Campaigns
Clean up a city park or a local youth league’s baseball field
Help to promote and work at a school event
Read/discuss as a team “Chop Wood, Carry Water” by Joshua Medcalf
Also, if you want cheerleaders, band and drill team members to attend and support your games like they do other sporting events at your school, try attending their competitions as a sign of school spirit and reciprocity. You will find they will appreciate it very much!
When we do these things we coach champions, Champions for Life.
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